Friday, April 11, 2008

Lord, give me patience with my sweet Tyler.....




















So, it seems that my fellow blogger who just happen to be my best friends have been opening up on their blog. This is hard for me because when I put new posts up, I only want to share the happy things going on with the cute pictures. So, here we go. This is what I have been struggling with lately....

For those who don't know Tyler that well, he is a very curious little guy. He probably gets this from me at least that is what my husband tells me. I am very curious I guess but as an adult, I can contain the majority of it to myself. But my sweet 4 year old doesn't contain anything.

So lately he has had a question for every 3rd and 4th question. All day long I answer questions for him and most the time there is no answers for him. Bless his heart, he just wants knowledge I tell myself. I have thought that I could blog all of the questions he asked in one day and then blog them so you could see. But, I catch myself getting so frustrated with him that I don't want to answer him much less type them all out on my blog. It literally drains me.

This is awful and I feel so guilty because I know it is my job to raise him and get him ready for school and the world. I don't mind answering the questions that there is an answer for. It is the 3rd and 4th questions like a snowball effect that sends me over the edge and it is about everything all day long!

i.e. We drove past Hawaiian Falls the other day and he noticed the big water slides. He asked me what is that for....I have an answer for him...No problem, right? I tell him what it is and that maybe we will go when it gets hotter outside. Then we turn and go on down the road and he always says huh, not b/c he didn't hear but b/c he didn't catch everything I just told him and he has to know everything I just said! So I repeat what I just said.....not frustrated yet at this point unless Haylee is screaming or something. Then he moves to the 3rd question (2nd question was the Huh?) But, where did it go?.... Back there, mommy turned!....getting a little frustrated. (4th ?) But where mommy? as he tries to turn around......Behind us Tyler. (5th) But why........ now I'm getting pretty frustrated.... Because we turned Tyler......But where is it? So as you can see the questions start over and I want it to end so I end up most of the time yelling at him and tell him no more answers. I also started telling him...You ask too many questions Tyler which I wish I could take back. He now turns that around and tells me that when I am asking him important questions.

See, I am already spent telling you about it. This is my day all day. It is about one thing or another. The questions have been going on for a while but the past few weeks he has been doing that dead end brick wall thing with the questions. Ryan is good to tune him out when he gets to that point and it stops but he doesn't deal with it all day like me. Any advise is welcome. I don't want Tyler to think I don't want to hear what he has to say or to push him away. Lord, help me to see things through Tyler's eyes and to have extreme patience with him. Hep me to be renewed each day and to have more mercy towards Tyler.

On a side note..... if you could pray for him....he has been getting scared at night and even during the day. Dark rooms and going to bed have been not very fun lately. He has even been waking up in the middle of the night which is very frustrating. Not sure if it is this but, it has been going on since we went to the Zoo. He doesn't mention the Zoo or animals, just monsters and noises.

6 comments:

Deanna said...

I wish I had words of wisdom for you...but I obviously haven't been through that stage. We'll be praying for you!

Amy Crissey said...

Girl, I totally feel for you! Having a toddler/preschooler, a baby and one on the way is a difficult task. It's hard to find the patience on a day to day basis! My SIL posts notes for herself around the house with the words HAVE PATIENCE or my favorite I LOVE MY CHILDREN. LOL Sometimes we need those little reminders to make it through a tough day. I say Ryan's ignoring is a good idea too after the last answerable question...he'll get the picture sooner or later ; ) Hugs and hang in there!

Sheila said...

I haven't been there yet either, but I'll be sure to keep you in my prayers. You are the most patient person I know, so I can just imagine me in that situation! :) Love ya girl!

Laura said...

Yes, girl, I too only wanted to post happy, cute things my kids did. But if feels good to be honest and real with struggles doesn't it? :)
Jake is doing this some too. One thing I started was to give a really silly answer to all the silly questions. "why, mom?" when he knows why, or there is NO why...I'll say, "Because turkey-goose Jake." He'll laugh, say, no Mom! and that changes the subject. I also really liked what you said about praying to see Tyler through God's eyes. Today I prayed for more compassion for Jake, just as God has compassion for us. The reason he hangs on me and always wants me to play is because he loves me! He needs me! When I see things through his eyes and also as God sees him, it helps. I'm right here with you girlfriend!

mommyof5 said...

I smiled when I read this, because with the twins and Aaron we are going through this same thing. And when I write this and I telling myself this too: You are not alone in this struggle. I thought for some reason I was the only one dealing with this. But as I can see and should have know I am not alone. I get so tired of all 3 boys talking and asking a million and 1 questions. I finally have to ask each of them to just be quiet and let mommy's head stop spinning. I get the questions as soon as they get up and they don't stop until they go to bed. I understand how you feel about feeling gulity about not wanting to answer them all, when God gave them to us to help them learn and grow. And to do that they have to ask questions. I just have a hard time with question after question.
I also too like when you asked God to help see what Tyler sees through his eyes. I have been doing that myself with things that they do and ask. I ask how would I want someone to deal with me if I did this or asked this.
And it makes things harder to deal with nicely when you are tired have a 7 month old and a baby on the way. Give your self a breather every day and just keep telling yourself you are the mom God made you to be. And just ask God to help you grow in the areas he wants you to grow. It will get better!!
Mommy of 5

Anonymous said...

Praying for you and Tyler honey. God will give you insight all along how to deal with Tyler's curiosity if you stay open and say a quick prayer when you feel you need help. MaeMae said, be thankful he does ask questions - No telling how God will use him and his curiosity. Love Moma.